September & October in the Old Pueblo
A write up of Friendly & Fearless Tucson Death Cafe
As the weather begins to cool in the desert, we gather for the TDC in relief that fall is here!
In September, 19 folks gathered outside for dinner, drinks and conversations about the 'shadow sides' of caregiving for a dying person, if they chose to take Kristine up on this as 'anchor topic'. Others discussed local cremation costs and final wishes, as they came hoping to do. People used the words helpful, open, ease-full, thought provoking, real and enlightening to describe the experience. Some folks were frustrated by the noise level of the live music outside, so in October we tried meeting in an indoor space at Monterey Court.
In October, 16 people came to the Monterey Court Café and Galleries the 1st Tuesday evening for the 12th meeting of the Tucson Death Cafe. The cafe was held an hour earlier in anticipation of shorter days and cooler temps (6:00-8:00pm). Though the day had been warm, the heat lifted quickly as the sun set and that is something most everyone here notices with welcome. About half the group had attended prior and half were new to the cafe. Small groups spread out into the outdoor courtyard spaces after first greetings and getting refreshments in the meeting room. Kristine planted the idea of sharing "death fables" - pondering out loud around our thoughts of our own death and imagining our ideal or desired death scenario. How have we thought of it, and how would we want it, e.g., age, circumstance, attitude? In self-assembled 2s, 3s and 4s we took turns speaking and listening. Then we all came together again in the meeting room and had the opportunity to share insights and revelations with the larger group. No pressure of course, just an opportunity for anyone moved to speak to do so. Enough were willing and there was plenty to talk about. Kristine brought things to a close as the planned time approached. As usual and fine, some lingered, there were conversations to finish, contact information to exchange, and gratitudes to express. Seemed a good night.