Herne Hill Death Cafe
A write up of Herne Hill Death Cafe
By annkenrick
Death Café – Carnegie Library
5th May 2026
Report
Five people attended this DC facilitated by 2 people. Themes that emerged from the discussion included:
· Moments of remembering people who have died – the Uncle who always made the gravy
· Questioning oneself about whether one did enough to help someone before they died
· Harsh combination of grief for parent who has died and anticipatory grief for other parent living with dementia
· But also triggered attendee to make big decision to move out of London to the sea and live her best life
· Importance of funerals in helping us come to terms with those who had died
· Importance of legacy of the person who has deid – enabling family and friend to focus on the things they can cherish about the person (planting trees, leaving recipes, paintings, children, telling one’s story)
· Radical intervention of one who followed Islamic burial ritual but then stepped forward and left her own handful of earth on the grave despite being a woman and putting her flowers on the grave – and how this was accepted by the community.
Positive feedback: Very useful and enlightening to talk about death freely
Really useful space to have an open and honest conversation – really useful to hear from others about their experiences of death and relationship with their own mortality. I found the discussions round the table very poignant and moving. It helped me connect also to my own grief.
Ann kenrick