Death Cafe profile for Ren
Location: United States
About Ren:
I (Ren, she/her) have served as the Social Services Senior Administrator at the Domestic Violence Coordinating Council (DVCC) for the past three years, where I oversee and facilitate the state’s Fatal Incident Review Team (FIRT). I previously lead Cecil County, Maryland’s Domestic Violence Fatality Review Team, coordinating their multidisciplinary response to domestic violence, and leading the county's Sexual Assault Response Team. Needless to say, the bulk of my professional life revolves around death! I graduated from the University of Delaware in 2021 where I triple majored in Political Science, Sociology, and Women & Gender Studies, with a concentration in Domestic Violence Prevention and Services. I currently serve as Vice Chair of the Delaware Victims' Rights Task Force and as a member of the Delaware Alliance Against Sexual Violence's Board of Directors. Outside of my professional passions, I am an animal lover passionate about animal welfare; I foster for the Brandywine Valley SPCA and volunteer in a variety of settings with my pet and certified therapy dog, Huck, through PAWS for People.
What brings you to Death Cafe?
In addition to a professional life surrounded by death, I also have extensive personal experience with grief and loss. Death and I have walked in hand for most of my life. Shortly before I was born, my father's father died in a freak accident. When I was just five years old, my father and both my grandmothers died within a year of one another. In time, lost both of my mother's brothers far before their time and my final grandparent, my mom's father in 2020. Needless to say, Death and I are on a first name basis. Our complicated relationship has gone through many evolutions, and now I welcome the opportunity to share my story and connect with others about their experiences and feelings around death and dying.
What would you like your legacy to be?
I would like my legacy to be my connections to the people around me, the thoughts and feelings I shared with them, and a carried forward passion for fueling connectedness and empathy.
Thoughts for sharing:
I find deep comfort in the belief that there is no truly unique human experience or feeling. Though I exist uniquely within the intersections of my identity and all my life experiences together, making the sum of my parts unique, each piece of that puzzle is not unique at all. I was not the first person to experience grief nor will I be the last. My despair and heartbreak when my first partner dumped me is something many relate to. None of the emotions I feel are new. That shared human experience is kindling to the fire that is connection and community building.
Contact Ren
Ren's posts on the Death Cafe website
With Ren Cuevas
Dec. 1, 2025, 6.30 p.m. - 8.30 p.m. (EST)
Accepts donations