Death Cafe - Millerton, NY
A write up of Death Cafe - Millerton NY
By ljoy
Death Cafe Millerton, NY
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Our 3rd DEATH CAFE, and second time meeting at Irving Farm Coffee House, brought out an incredible group of people, with several familiar faces back for yet another evening of deep conversation, good vibes and delicious cake. The group was made up of men and women ranging in age from 40 - 75 and included nurses / former nurses, several published writers/authors and end of life doulas. They came from NY, CT and MA and formed our death cafe "community". The 4 candle-lit tables, each sat 5-6 guests and were arranged to create a cozy feeling. As a way to encourage guests to get to know each other, we put name tags and sign in sheets on each table and let them choose where they wanted to sit. This meet and greet time seems to break the ice nicely.
Suzanne started her welcome at about 6:40 pm and thanked everyone for coming out and participating . She talked about the DEATH CAFE, how it began in Europe and where it is today. Suzanne announced the topic/question of the evening and we began....
Each table had a "menu" that looked like this, to help us keep the evening focused and on track.
A place where people come together in a relaxed and safe setting to discuss death, dying, end of life issues, drink tea and eat delicious cake.
Facilitator: Suzanne B. O'Brien, RN,
Huge Thanks to Kathy Shapiro at
Irving Farm Coffee House for the use of the CAFE space and Katie for working
MENU
6:30 Meet and Greet - make up your name tag
Find your table, we encourage you to meet new people, sit with someone you may not know.
Delicious cake and water to share on your tables... or order something you'd like
6:40 Welcome, intros and history by Suzanne
6:45 Topic for the evening (we changed from our original question that was printed on the form)
1A. "What do you think happens to you after you die?
Table discussion
1B. Why do you think that?
Table discussion
Please be mindful of our time together and give each person time to share
7:30 Group Share led by Suzanne (if you would like to share, not mandatory)
8:15 Q &A
8:15 Evaluation Forms this really helps us continually improve the event BOTH SIDES PLEASE
8:20 Community Building please get to know and network with others as the group changes each time.
8:30 End of Event
NEXT DEATH CAFE THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 21st SIGN UP NOW SPACE LIMITED
The topic of the evening PART A - was thought provoking and got us thinking about our personal "beliefs" ...since no one actually knows for sure "what happens to us after we die" each guest shared what they thought or hoped might be in store for them at the end of their life. The room filled with energy. Going around the table, no two answers were the same. There was discussion about the physical body, the spirit....how we leave this world and where we go.....what does the great beyond hold? Is it a place? Is it a better place? Is it the same for everyone?
In Part A we each had our ideas of what might happen but PART B of the question wanted to know WHY we thought that. WHERE those ideas came from? WHAT and/or WHO shaped those opinions? There were specific moments for some that formed their thoughts, others had an ideal they believed in. Some approached it in a traditional way and others took an unconventional approach. Many were unsure.
Sharing these stories is powerful and healing and personal. How great to have the DEATH CAFE. A safe place to be able to talk about death and dying and our intimate feelings around this topic and feel compassion and caring from the other attendees.
The Group Share was amazing and coming together as a group helps create that sense of community, respect and genuine interest. Nearly everyone wanted to participate. Here are some things that were shared.....
"I call this part of my journey 'earth school'"
"Life is a classroom, death is a transition"
"Life is defined by death"
"Death is part of the cycle of Life"
"It is ALL about unconditional LOVE"
There was time for Q&A and networking and mingling.
Evaluations were circulated for completion.
It appeared from all the evaluation forms that we did an EXCELLENT job and achieved the mission. Everyone LOVES Suzanne, she is a fantastic facilitator. Our guests left fulfilled, very glad they attended and will encourage others to attend future events.
We are looking forward to our next Death Cafe-Millerton, NY
Will we see you there?
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2013 6:30-8:30p
Irving Farm Coffee House
860 605 0330 to reserve your space.