Belleville, IL Death Cafe
A write up of Belleville, IL Death Cafe
By maggieboone
Death Café on July 18, 2015
Wow, we had a great turn out welcoming Brandy from Belleville; Christina and Kim from St Louis, MO as new members at our Death Cafe. Sharon exhibited photos of her grandmother and others that were taken many, many years ago. The interesting part of the photos was that they were all dead. Apparently eyes were painted on closed eyelids and they were posed as if they were alive (unfortunately, her grandmother’s right eye was a bit crooked and slightly smeared). Another member brought in cremains that she found in a drawer of an antique (said to be around 100 years old) dresser that were in jars – one small, one medium sized. It was slightly eerie. We talked about how photos were taken of the dead and posed in living positions. It was quite interesting, really.
We discussed the progress of our upcoming Midtowne Before I Die wall. We took a picture of the location and Maggie talked about setting up the “gofundme” account to raise the money for the 3 walls and the goal is to have the Midtowne wall up by the August 15th meeting. We have raised over $40 dollars so far – all donations will be used for materials only.
We also talked about an update on a discussion from the June meeting about Death Dulas or midwives that would be volunteers to guide a terminally ill person and their family through the death of the terminally ill and help family through the grieving process, both before, during, and after the death. Jim gave us an update on the cost and information he had to date on that.
Lee, from Southern Illinois Hospice, was asked to talk a bit about what Hospice really is and dispel some of the misguided ideas of what it is. That included administering pain medication that is known to even speed up the death of the patient. That led to discussion on assisted suicide or human euthanasia. One person commented that it was sad how there was more compassion in euthanizing our beloved pets and how that is not allowed (yet) for our loved ones.
An intern from Heartlinks, a grief support program of Family Hospice, came to represent that organization (Diana was busy with another commitment), and educated us on the program for the ones who were new. Maggie mentioned that Heatlinks will be working on the 2nd Before I Die wall and funding was in the works to help with the cost. Sharon took that opportunity to ask Lee if perhaps Southern Illinois Hospice would be willing to build a wall at the Glen Carbon, IL location. Lee said that might be possible and would check into it.
Discussion was constant with a wide variety of topics as you can see but the most compelling was when Christina asked about dying wishes and prearrangements. We talked about how hard it was to make some of those decisions and what a precious gift it was, when loved ones made prearrangements. A sudden death can definitely have an impact on the ability of the family and friends that might have to make the decisions on what to do.
Our next meeting will be held on August 15, 2015 from 6pm – 8pm CST at the Miscellanea House Café. Please enjoy the photos attached
Comments
Are there any death cafes in st louis?
When do you meet in Belleville?
Thx.
Posted by Y